{"id":331,"date":"2013-01-19T12:42:01","date_gmt":"2013-01-19T17:42:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.chistell.com\/africanamericanfiction\/?p=331"},"modified":"2016-10-08T23:43:40","modified_gmt":"2016-10-09T03:43:40","slug":"loving-the-right-man-loving-the-right-woman","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.chistell.com\/africanamericanfiction\/loving-the-right-man-loving-the-right-woman\/","title":{"rendered":"Loving the Right Man, Loving the Right woman"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Denise Turney<\/p>\n

While listening to Virginia Beach, Virginia\u2019s radio station 95.7 FM as I conduct research for various writing clients, every now and then a commercial will cross the wire. During the commercial, teens speak about undesirable behaviors their boyfriends or girlfriends engage in. Some teens talk about their boyfriends\/girlfriends getting jealous simply because they spoke to another person. Other teens, on the commercial, talk about their girlfriends\/boyfriends hitting them because they “love them so much”. The driving message of the commercial is that love doesn\u2019t hurt. Love doesn\u2019t harm<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Love Never Fails<\/strong><\/p>\n

Purpose of the commercial is to make parents aware of signs of domestic violence, painful events their growing children might be part of. It\u2019s a message teens and <\/i>adults may benefit from hearing repeatedly. This may be due, in part, to the fact that a wealth of emotions are typically a part of explosive, violent relationships. These high emotions can be intoxicating, pulling us in, promising positive emotional highs we may never come down from. Hearing love songs may increase our emotional highs, making it hard for us to break away from these unhealthy relationships, cause us to feel as if a love spell has been placed on us. Rocky, dysfunctional relationships might feel good for awhile. However, love doesn\u2019t hurt.<\/p>\n

If relationships don\u2019t involve physical violence, they may involve sexual, financial, emotional or psychological violence. This isn\u2019t love. Even if people we\u2019re in relationships with send us poems about love or quotes about love, that doesn’t mean they love us. Love doesn\u2019t hurt.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not love when we search for (actually look for) faults, errors, wrongs or mistakes in others. That\u2019s not love. It\u2019s not love when we broadcast or highlight mistakes others make, as if talking about someone else\u2019s mistakes wipes our mistakes clean. It\u2019s not love when we try to control and\/or manipulate others by force, guilt, fear, discomfort (ever perform the silent treatment<\/i> on someone) or embarrassment.<\/p>\n

Love is Patient, Love is Kind<\/strong><\/p>\n

As I Corinthians 13:4-8 says, \u201c4 <\/sup>Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 <\/sup>It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 <\/sup>Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 <\/sup>It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 <\/sup>Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.\u201d<\/p>\n

Contrary to what some who choose <\/i>to abuse claim, love never failing doesn\u2019t mean that we should stay in abusive relationships. We were created by love. We were created with love. We were created to love. We were created to be loved. As Raymond Clarke learns early in the new book, Love Pour Over Me<\/a>, we are here to awaken to love. And we have the strength to do that.<\/p>\n

Love stands up against the toughest storms. Love conquers all, or perhaps better put, true love remains in its natural state despite all attempts to change it. Even when we think love is gone or buried, it remains. All we have to do is open our eyes and awaken. Sometimes life brings a certain person or specific people, like good friends and a soul mate, into our lives so we can awaken to love. For Raymond, these invitations to accept and receive love come in the form of Brenda (the love of Raymond\u2019s life) and three good-good friends.<\/p>\n

Violence, though all around the college students to the point of bloodshed, doesn\u2019t become a part of their relationships. Considering the harrowing and mysterious experiences Raymond has with NFL star, Anthony Thompson, it\u2019s eye raising that the friends never turn on each other. Considering secrets in Raymond\u2019s family\u2019s past, it\u2019s a wonder Brenda continues to love Raymond<\/a>.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s also eye raising that Raymond doesn\u2019t give up on love, his childhood being anything but ordinary. Then, love does not fail. Regardless of twists, turns, challenges and doubts \u2013 love simply does not fail. It also never hurts. And when we\u2019re loving the right man or loving the right woman, relationships fill our lives with goodness.<\/p>\n

Get your copy of \u201cLove Pour Over Me\u201d Now at – <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

http:\/\/www.ebookit.com\/books\/0000001582\/Love-Pour-Over-Me.html<\/a><\/p>\n

Sources<\/strong>:<\/b><\/p>\n

Amazon.com – http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/Love-Pour-Over-Me-ebook\/dp\/B007MC0Z2C<\/a><\/p>\n

Barnes & Noble – http:\/\/www.barnesandnoble.com\/w\/love-pour-over-me-denise-turney\/1109600654<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Denise Turney While listening to Virginia Beach, Virginia\u2019s radio station 95.7 FM as I conduct research for various writing clients, every now and then a commercial will cross the wire. 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