Loving the Right Man, Loving the Right woman

By Denise Turney

While listening to Virginia Beach, Virginia’s radio station 95.7 FM as I conduct research for various writing clients, every now and then a commercial will cross the wire. During the commercial, teens speak about undesirable behaviors their boyfriends or girlfriends engage in. Some teens talk about their boyfriends/girlfriends getting jealous simply because they spoke to another person. Other teens, on the commercial, talk about their girlfriends/boyfriends hitting them because they “love them so much”. The driving message of the commercial is that love doesn’t hurt. Love doesn’t harm.

Love Never Fails

Purpose of the commercial is to make parents aware of signs of domestic violence, painful events their growing children might be part of. It’s a message teens and adults may benefit from hearing repeatedly. This may be due, in part, to the fact that a wealth of emotions are typically a part of explosive, violent relationships. These high emotions can be intoxicating, pulling us in, promising positive emotional highs we may never come down from. Hearing love songs may increase our emotional highs, making it hard for us to break away from these unhealthy relationships, cause us to feel as if a love spell has been placed on us. Rocky, dysfunctional relationships might feel good for awhile. However, love doesn’t hurt.

If relationships don’t involve physical violence, they may involve sexual, financial, emotional or psychological violence. This isn’t love. Even if people we’re in relationships with send us poems about love or quotes about love, that doesn’t mean they love us. Love doesn’t hurt.

It’s not love when we search for (actually look for) faults, errors, wrongs or mistakes in others. That’s not love. It’s not love when we broadcast or highlight mistakes others make, as if talking about someone else’s mistakes wipes our mistakes clean. It’s not love when we try to control and/or manipulate others by force, guilt, fear, discomfort (ever perform the silent treatment on someone) or embarrassment.

Love is Patient, Love is Kind

As I Corinthians 13:4-8 says, “4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.”

Contrary to what some who choose to abuse claim, love never failing doesn’t mean that we should stay in abusive relationships. We were created by love. We were created with love. We were created to love. We were created to be loved. As Raymond Clarke learns early in the new book, Love Pour Over Me, we are here to awaken to love. And we have the strength to do that.

Love stands up against the toughest storms. Love conquers all, or perhaps better put, true love remains in its natural state despite all attempts to change it. Even when we think love is gone or buried, it remains. All we have to do is open our eyes and awaken. Sometimes life brings a certain person or specific people, like good friends and a soul mate, into our lives so we can awaken to love. For Raymond, these invitations to accept and receive love come in the form of Brenda (the love of Raymond’s life) and three good-good friends.

Violence, though all around the college students to the point of bloodshed, doesn’t become a part of their relationships. Considering the harrowing and mysterious experiences Raymond has with NFL star, Anthony Thompson, it’s eye raising that the friends never turn on each other. Considering secrets in Raymond’s family’s past, it’s a wonder Brenda continues to love Raymond.

It’s also eye raising that Raymond doesn’t give up on love, his childhood being anything but ordinary. Then, love does not fail. Regardless of twists, turns, challenges and doubts – love simply does not fail. It also never hurts. And when we’re loving the right man or loving the right woman, relationships fill our lives with goodness.

Get your copy of “Love Pour Over Me” Now at –



Amazon.com – http://www.amazon.com/Love-Pour-Over-Me-ebook/dp/B007MC0Z2C

Barnes & Noble – http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/love-pour-over-me-denise-turney/1109600654

Accessing Strong Faith to Realize Your Dreams

By Denise Turney

The genesis of faith is in the realm where physical eyes do not see. Faith might reveal itself in an emotion or thought. For example, if you want to land a six-figure job and buy a new house, faith might cause you to feel happy, hopeful and joyous when you drive through neighborhoods filled with houses that resemble the type of house you want to live in.

If you let the feelings and thoughts strengthen you will allow faith to connect your inner and outer vision causing you to see with your physical eyes what you first saw with your inner vision. Eventually you will have what you asked for (whether you used words or simply desire, absent words, to ask).

Temptations to Stop Using Faith to Realize Your Dreams

It all sounds simple enough and it is simple. However, we live in a physical world (even the physically blind use physical senses like touch to navigate the earth’s terrain). It’s tempting to keep checking to see if our faith is moving our inner vision for what we want into the physical realm. When we hear of others who have manifested their desires ahead of us we can start to feel like we’ll never get what we’ve been asking for. If we compare ourselves to others too much, we might start telling ourselves we’re “unlucky,” “not from the right family or background,” “created to sacrifice our desires so others can achieve” (this one is absolutely absurd!) or a failure.

I’m sure you can guess what likely occurs next. Yep. We quit trying to achieve our dreams, and that, my friend is not a fun life, because our authentic self will not stop asking for what it wants, and we may live a life of conflict, lacking peace, if we don’t get back to exercising strong faith to realize our dreams. It’s this refusal to quit that keeps moving Love Pour Over Me’s Raymond Clarke forward, propelling him to pursue his dreams to become one of the world’s top middle distance runners. Refusal to quit is also the reason Raymond never stops believing in and searching for love. Like many of us, the wait for true love seems too long for Raymond. Yet, the thought of living without love is too painful.

Realizing Your Dreams

The bottom line is – we were created to live vibrant, joyous, love-filled experiences . . . nothing short of it . . . ever. As we start doubting and not getting our most sincere, love-based requests while witnessing others doing the same, we may even tell ourselves that it’s the human condition to struggle, to be in conflict and misery. But this is a lie. Fortunately, there are enough of us using faith to realize our dreams to blow this lie out of the water.

For many students at a famous Pennsylvania university, Raymond’s successes serve as encouragement. Other students on the spacious university campus simply admire Raymond’s athletic achievements from afar, cheering him on with each win. While appreciating the support, Raymond can’t help but long for his father’s approval, something he didn’t get even when he was a little boy. This is where Raymond’s seeds of doubt about love and a truly good life derive. He starts to wonder if he can have what he really wants – a lifetime of love.

However, just because we don’t know how to start a car doesn’t mean a car won’t start. Just because we haven’t succeeded at riding ocean waves doesn’t mean ocean waves can’t be ridden (surfers do it all the time). Just because no one had broken the four minute mile didn’t mean humans couldn’t break the four minute mile (Roger Bannister broke the supposedly impossible to break four minute mile in 1954. Since that time the supposedly impossible fete has been accomplished by track runners many times with the fastest mile to date being run in 3:43. Perhaps it was the mental barrier that needed to be broken before the actual fete could be accomplished).

Possibly searching for a list of impossible fetes that humans achieved will help you to realize whatever you’re telling yourself is impossible might be very possible if you exercise faith to realize your dreams. Perhaps if you read stories of other people who felt a dream birthing inside themselves then worked to achieve or manifest the dream in the physical realm your faith will be strengthened.

It also might help to think about your love-based desires and paying attention to how good you feel when you see yourself achieving them. It’s this joy you want to feel all the time. Realizing your love-based dreams can help you to do this. It worked for Raymond in Love Pour Over Me. It’s worked for countless people around the globe. It can work for you.

Thank you for reading my blog. To learn what happens to Raymond, Brenda and the other characters in Love Pour Over Me, hop over to Amazon.com, B&N.com, Ebookit.com and get your copy of Love Pour Over Me today. And again I say – Thank You! Even if you choose not to purchase your copy of Love Pour Over Me today, I encourage you to “consider Love.”


Love Pour Over Me – http://www.ebookit.com/books/0000001582/Love-Pour-Over-Me.html