By Denise Turney
Men might not want it to get out, but they appreciate romance as much as women do. However, men express romantic feelings differently than women do. It’s easy to see why. Men, whether they are raised by a woman or a man, are generally raised to hide certain emotions. For example, emotions that lend the perception that a man is emotionally or psychologically weak, are taboo for boys to express in many households.
Some of these emotions are sadness, fear and vulnerability. It might not seem like it, but when you see a man who finds it hard to express his romantic feelings towards you, you’re actually looking at a man who has been taught to hide those feelings. Make him feel safe (or give him enough time to start to feel safe with you on his own, as he shares more experiences with you) and don’t be surprised if he begins to let you see how he feels about you more fully.
Truth is, we all desire to both give and receive love. It’s part of the circle of life, what keeps us connected, whole. Where we differ is in our genetics and our childhood programming. Even more, it’s during the first five years of our physical experiences that our brains are developed. Now, imagine that a boy was scolded or belittled each time he expressed “soft” emotions from the time he was two years.
If you meet that man when he’s in his twenties, you might feel like you’re pulling your own teeth when you try to get him to express romantic emotion. There’s nothing wrong with the man; it’s the coding or programming he received as a child. What you have to ask yourself is if you enjoy being with the man enough to wait until he sees that he no longer needs the old programming (programming he might have been given by well intentioned parents, friends and extended relatives).
It’s also important to remember that there’s no guarantee that a man (or woman) will feel safe enough to express his romantic emotions for you fully. In this case, you might decide to stop at friendship with this person. Whatever you decide, this much is sure. There’s a loving person, someone who wants to feel wanted, beneath the surface, at the core. Gender can’t stop that from being the case.
Thank you for reading my blog. To learn what happens to Raymond, Brenda and the other characters in Love Pour Over Me, hop over to Amazon.com, B&N.com, Ebookit.com, or any other online or offline bookseller and get your copy of Love Pour Over Me today. And again I say – Thank You! Consider Love.